I wrote this poem last fall. So, today seems like a good day to post it.
I had the same makeup artist as Paul Newman. She raved about his Fig Newman’s and his Oreos, but he is not allowed to call his Oreos “Oreos” as that is a licensed trademark of Nabisco. She said, “Cool Hand Luke—only Paul Newman can make hardboiled eggs sexy,” and I said, “I’m not a fan of hardboiled eggs, but yeah, his eyes sure are something—something cool and refreshing like his peppermint cups, yet strong and impassioned like his low-fat, all natural pretzel rods—something to justify taking home a fugitive along with his wheat-free, dairy-free chocolate chip cookies for dessert.”