Tag Archives: advertising

Landscaping is expensive

It’s easy to watch this commercial without even noticing the bushes and shrubs magically being groomed while these attractive, active, young women go about their happy, privileged lives:

I’m not against the thing.  The thing itself looks convenient enough.  It’s just the fact that the commercial goes so far out of its way to just come out and say it: “This lets you trim and shave your pubic hair.”

Instead you have to see those bushes and realize that those are a metaphor forwell, bushes.

You know what does make me skeptical?  This commercial implies that the un-groomed bushes are somehow less nice or less worthy.  Before and after shots, and the after is always preferable.  Always more beautiful.

I say, do whatever you want with your bushes.  Don’t let Schick and it’s silly advertisements influence how you landscape.  There’re just a bunch of men behind them, I’m sure.  Don’t let a bunch of men tell you that you’ve gotta fork out $12 if you, too, want to be attractive and active and happy.

Well if this isn’t the most obnoxious thing I’ve seen…

Masturbation and Shave Gel Commercials

While taking in an episode of “Arrested Development” on hulu a couple days ago, an Edge Shave Gel commercial was shown during the first break.  It distracted me so much that I’m not sure I even finished watching the episode.  It features four girls in green bikinis stroking themselves and saying things like “moist lubricant.”  Then they put on new green bikinis and preceed everything they say with words like big, giant, massive, colossal, enormous.  It’s cool how Edge decided to get really blatant with the tried and true message, “If you buy our product these girls will bang you.” 

No, actually, it’s not.  It pissed me off, much like this Twix commercial.   Edge is probably trying to make fun of the “sex sells” standard, but that doesn’t change the fact that these women are getting paid to stroke themselves and make references to sex and penis size, while saying absolutely nothing about shave gel.  

“dclehr” shows exactly why this commercial sucks so much in a YouTube comment: “this commercial made me laugh for a good 5 minutes. The point was to make fun of girls trying to be sexy and sell a product. It served it’s purpose.”   Notice how you can just end that sentence with “The point was to make fun of girls.” 

I can take a joke, but not one that uses women as sex objects to sell their product.  So, that said, take a look:     

I guess I was wrong. Hot girls in bikinis doesn’t always equal a successful commercial. Really a pathetic effort… -crazygolfer333

i had to masterbathe at this it was sweet -alphadog303

“And it’s, like, the mainstream media’s fault.”

I’m reading Malcolm Gladwell’s Outliers: The Story Of Success.  I can’t remember if I read The Tipping Point, but I seem to recall Blink helping me overcome a little bit of my indecisiveness.  Gladwell is very good at what my English professors used to call “reading against the grain” and “finding fault lines” in the things society assumes to be givens.  In Outliers he says that to become an expert at anything it requires 10,000 hours of practice.  Piano, computer programming, skiing…blogging? 

Speaking of blogging, this is one of my least favorite commercials on television at the moment:

I don’t even know where to begin.  Twix completely undermines the intelligence, consciousness, and political frustrations this woman voices by reminding everyone that despite having a brain, she is still nothing more than a sex object to be taken home.  Because no woman goes back to a strange guy’s apartment with the intent to blog…or at least, not JUST to blog. 

Okay, deep breath.  Must end on a positive note: Malcolm Gladwell looks just like Sideshow Bob:

gladwellsideshow

Undermine THAT!