Something about documentaries chronicling the ways of corporate giants really gets me off. I can’t even tell you how many satisfying nights I’ve spent watching Wal-Mart: The High Cost of Low Price. So you can imagine how excited I was when I noticed “The Age of Wal-Mart” while Hulu-surfing. I had no idea they did away with the blue smocks. They should also consider doing away with the Wal-Mart chant (it brings me back to that cult I almost joined).
Also getting me off these days is my Flintstones vitamins:
Choline is a precursor to trimethylamine, which some persons are not able to break down due to a genetic disorder. Persons suffering from this disorder, called trimethylaminuria, may suffer from a strong fishy or otherwise unpleasant body odor due to the body’s release of odorous trimethylamine.
And here I thought the fishy odor was just my vagina.
Despite my repugnant odor, I still scored a business card from a man on the subway earlier tonight. We were chatting about Halloween costumes. He said that he’d thought of his early this year: “It just came to me!” He was so excited, so I wondered why he didn’t share it with me. When I pressed him on the issue, his voice went low, and he said, “Well, it’s not really…” “Appropriate?” “Yeah.”
It’s also not good. It’s one of those “punny” costume ideas. You know the ones. The ones that never live up to the funny part. All I’ll say is that it involves this jersey:
Silly me I still took his card. And turns out…he’s got a really sweet job. One that comes with prestige, benefits, and a blue smock. By Armani. Or someone.
That said, I would never write about him or his Halloween costume if I actually planned to call. I’ll take documentaries over a douchebag anyday. YouknowwhatI’msayin?