So, I took 1970’s Love Story out of the library today because…I try not to admit this, but…sometimes I’m a girl. I know, it’s crazy.
Anyway, it just has me really depressed. Because first of all, it’s really dramatic. And also, Ryan O’Neal looks exactly like John McCain. Not John McCain now, obviously, but this John McCain:
I don’t know. Maybe it’s just me. Maybe I need to push John McCain out of my mind. Then again, it’s not like two blog posts ago was a poem about him or that he’s ended up in my dreams. I think he just really scares the shit out of me, so it’s better to let it out. No use being a repressed asshole.
I also took out Annie Hall. I’m just really in the mood for neurotic right now. I know Woody Allen is kind of a crazy dude, but I really like him. Not in a sexual way, but in the same way I like pigeons.
I’ve decided “Never Have I Ever” is the worst game ever. I was at a party and this dude starts the bar at, “Never have I ever had sex on acid.” What?? He proceeded to say that there was nothing else he hadn’t done. He was wearing a shirt that said “I Heart Hot Moms.” One of those crappy ones you get at Old Navy on clearance for $5, or you buy it at full price and you’re even more of an ass. Anyway, I wanted to get angry so I asked him about his experiences with hot moms, he told me, and yeah. Nothing wrong with being proud of yourself for getting laid, but…have some class. This guy didn’t. Plus there were only two girls at this party so the machismo was just way too much to handle. Gay jokes were flying everywhere, you couldn’t say two words without someone yelling out “That’s what she said!”, and yeah. I had to lash out at someone, so that was that. Sometimes I feel like more of a man than the dudes I encounter. Okay, most of the time. Is that weird to say? I don’t care.
Oh, Wristcutters: A Love Story is a really good movie. It’s about suicide and the afterlife and what could be more romantic than that? And Tom Waits is in it! Bizarre.