Tag Archives: seven years in tibet

Thoughts on going to the bathroom in Post-Christian-Bale-Freak-Out America

Chris Tucker and Jackie Chan were in the women’s room at the Queens Library today–a DVD of Rush Hour 2 was leaning upright behind the toilet seat (you know, right behind where you put your butt).  I would’ve liked to use that stall, except that it was kind of a disaster.  I don’t know about you, but I am all for unisex bathrooms.  I would love unisex bathrooms.  There are so many times when I’ve opted for the men’s room.  Usually, you know, when there are long lines for the women’s room and I’ve been drinking.  But I really do think it’s the more efficient way, as well as a way to improve gender relations, accomodate for the transgendered, and just make the whole discarding of bodily waste thing more interesting.  For example, one Halloween I was waiting for the stall in a men’s room and I was able to meet a man dressed up as Bruce Wayne at the urinal.  That makes, like, three action movie stars/characters I’ve come across in close proximity to a toilet.  And I get so much satisfaction from being able to say I picked up Bruce Wayne at the urinal.  Too much satisfaction.

Speaking of Bruce Wayne, I’m pretty bummed about Christian Bale’s freak-out.  Why is he so ANGRY?  (I cannot get this remix out of my head.)  He needs to find some inner peace and fast.  Maybe he can remake Seven Years in Tibet or something.  Seven Years in TibetAgain.  Brad Pitt and Christian Bale lie restlessly in a tent as prayer flags wave passionately in the Tibetan wind.  Ang Lee will direct it. 

Speaking of faraway lands, thanks to clicking on a Facebook link asking if I’d like to live and work in New Zealand, and subsequently signing up to learn more, I now receive e-mails with subject lines like, “New Zealand needs you,” and most recently, “Free New Zealand ice cream.”

I’ve also begun learning a little of the Maori language.  Kia ora!  (Hello!)   Aotearoa. (‘Land of the long white cloud’.)  I went onto the New Zealand government’s job site and found a librarian position in a prison: responsible for the delivery of library/educational services ‘behind the wire’ to offenders.   Which sounds really exciting!  Skip that whole inmate penpal thing and just get right to the source.  So if I ever do obtain my Master’s in Library Science degree…adventures behind the wire in the land of the long white cloud await me.